Marital Tips

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The floor is considered an acceptable clothing storage location.

Never ask him to purchase feminine products, unless you are willing to assume he will come home with the wrong thing.

When watching TV, hugging is fine as you can still see around to watch the screen. Kissing is only for timeouts and commericals. Questions also have the best chance of being answered during this time period.

Don't hassle him when you're watching a show and he begins to change channels during the commerical. He knows the exact time the commercials will be over. Also, don't bug him when channel surfing about going back to something you saw, he passed it by for a reason.

If I mention a male friend of mine did something interesting, do not call his wife and ask her about it.

If you don't like the way I'm driving, close your eyes. Please refrain from makin that gasping inhalation noise of alarm. I expect to die peacefully in my sleep the way my grandfather did, not screaming like the other people in his car.

Just tell me what you want me to wear before I get dressed, don't ask me if I'm going to wear something I already have on. I can get dressed for anything in 10 minutes, because I'm getting dressed....not "ready" like you are.

Don't ask me if I prefer one outfit over another, that is a no win situation for me because you can't make up your mind. Get 'ready' and I'll be watching TV.

If you want me to put the seat down when I'm done, then you can put it up when you're done. That's only fair.

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