Dear Mr. Abby


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Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.

A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there
is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing - your
best friend. Far from being an issue, this can bring you closer
together. Why not get some of your old collage roommates involved too?
If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your
friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform oral
on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.



Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.

A: Do it. Sperm can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to
your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to
perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves
you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a
day, then cook him a nice meal.



Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The
man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A
night out chasing young single girls is a great stress relief and can
foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can
rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or
two (it's a great time to clean the house too)! Just look at how
emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best
thing to do when he gets home is for you and your best friend to
perform oral on him. Then cook him a nice meal.



Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband . If you must mess
with it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You
may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to
your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform
oral on him and cook him a delicious meal.



Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity
training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex
should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests
for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much
as you should he should never have to work to get you in the
mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by
performing oral on him and cook him a nice meal.



Dear Mr. Abby

Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep
never giving me one.

A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to
cook him a nice meal.






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