Kiwi and Aussie

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A New Zealand ventriloquist visiting Australia walks into a small
town and sees a local yokel sitting on his porch patting his dog.

He figures he'll have a little fun :

Ventriloquist: "G'day Mate! Good looking dog, mate. Mind if I speak
to him?"
Australian: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Kiwi."
Ventriloquist: "Hey dog, how's it going old mate?"
Dog: "Doin' alright."
Ventriloquist: "Is this Aussie your owner?" (pointing at Australian)
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great
food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Australian: look of disbelief
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Australian: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think."
Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool."
Australian: extreme look of shock
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?"
Horse: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How's he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me
regularly, brushes me down often , and keeps me in the barn to
protect me from the elements."
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"

Australian: "That sheep's a fucking liar!"

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