F Word

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This man goes to confession and says, "Forgive me father
for I have sinned." The priest asks if he would like to
confess his sins and the man replies that he used the
"F-word" over the weekend.

The priest says, "Oh okay, just say three Hail Marys and try to
watch your language.

The man replies that he would like to confess as to why he
said the "F-word". The priest sighs and tells him to continue.

Well father I played golf on Sunday with my buddies instead
of going to church.

The priest says, "And you got upset over that and swore?"

The man replied, "No, that wasn't why I swore. On the first
tee I duck-hooked my drive well left into the trees."

The priest said, "And that's when you swore."

The man replied, a little testily because of the constant
interruptions, "No, it wasn't. When I walked up the fairway, I
noticed my ball got a lucky bounce and I had a clear shot to
the green. However, before I could hit the ball, a squirrel ran
by and grabbed my ball and scurried up a tree."

The priest asked, "Is that when you said the 'F-word'?"

The man replied, "No, because an eagle then flew by and
caught the squirrel in it's sharp talons and flew away."

The priest let out a breath and queried, "Is that when you

The man replied, "No, because the eagle flew over the
green and the dying squirrel let go of my golf ball and it
landed within 5 inches of the hole."

The priest screamed, "Don't tell me you missed the
fucking putt!!!"

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