COMMAND REDUCTION OF ARMY PERSONNEL ( C.R.A.P. )


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As a result of DOD budget cutbacks, we are forced to reduce the size
of the force. Under CRAP, older soldiers will go on early retirement,
thus permitting the retention of lower paid soldiers who represent the
Army's future.

A program to phase out older soldiers via retirement by the end of the
current fiscal year will be placed in effect. the program will be
known as Retire Active Personnel Early (RAPE).

Employees who are RAPEd will be given the opportunity to seek civilian
employment within the Department of the Army. To that end, RAPEd
soldiers will be required to fill out numerous DA Forms (currently in
the development, test, and evaluation stage) detailing their education
and experience. This phase does not guarantee retired soldiers a
civil service position; it does, however, guarantee that the soldier's
unique capabilities will be considered before being bypassed in the
hiring process. This phase of CRAP is known as Survey of Capabilities
of Retired Warriors (SCREW).

Soldiers who have been RAPEd and SCREWed may request review of their
situation by higher authority. This is the Study by Higher Authority
Following Termination (SHAFT) phase.

CRAP policy dictates that a soldier may be RAPEd once, SCREWed twice,
but may be SHAFTed as many times as the Army leadership deems
appropriate.

If a soldier follows the above procedures, he or she will be entitled
to get Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance
(HERPES). As HERPES is considered a benefit payment, any soldier who
gets HERPES will no longer be RAPEd or SCREWed by the Army.

The Army leadership wishes to assure younger soldiers who remain on
active duty that the Army will continue its policy of ensuring that
soldiers are well trained through our Special High Intensity Training
(SHIT) program. The Army takes pride in the amount of SHIT our
soldiers receive and can boast that it gives its soldiers more SHIT
than any other service.

If a soldier feels he or she does not get enough SHIT, see your
commander. Your commander is especially trained to make sure you
receive all the SHIT you can stand.





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